Particularly, i don't want to have to go through all the effort of getting to know someone new. I wish i could just meet someone from my past, or someone i already know, and be with them for the rest of my life. I just want to be comfortable. I don't want to have to explain why I am the way I am to that guy; I want him to already know everything. Like, how could i explain to some guy that my irrational fear of the dark/monsters/serial killers stems from back to back weekends of my brothers babysitting me and telling me about the boogie man who lives in the downstairs closet? Really, try explaining that to a 20 year old man without having him run as fast as he can away from me.
                I want to have someone who just knows, he'll check in my closet and under my bed for me before saying goodnight. I want to have someone who knows that i shouldn't be allowed to eat popcorn without supervision otherwise i will eat multiple bags without even realizing. I want a guy who understands my inability to sit still and do homework, who will literally duck tape me to my desk chair until I am done. I want that guy who best understands my past to carry me to my future.

"I was at a funeral the day I realized I wanted to spend my life with you. Sitting down on the steps at the old post office the flag was flying at half mast and I was thinking about how everyone is dying and maybe it is time to live."