next year.

She says she's excited, and i say i am too, but we both know we are both half lying. We have no idea what this year will hold. I tell her she is what gives me hope for this year. She reads my mind when she says that we both have no idea if this is where we should be, but all that matters is that we're there and we have each other. There are going to be days we will break down crying, but we can make it through. We laugh now even if we may not laugh then, but we know somewhere within ourselves that it really will be okay.

It's hard to do this day by day thing, always waiting and never knowing whats coming next. It's intense, and all too real to handle. Sometimes it feels like your whole heart is being ripped out and held suspended in the air, waiting for anyone to just come around and create a home for it. I get that it scares you, believe me it scares me too. But i need you to help me face my fear. We can avoid it together or we can conquer it together. I think we could find something great if we just fought it, you know, tooth and nail. We'll stare it in the eye until life realizes that we're too strong for that kind of thing. I can almost see the end now, like the morning glow, the sun on the horizon. There's something great just beyond what we can see. I need you to trust me on this one.

"And every time you feel like crying, I'm gonna try and make you laugh and if I can't, if it just hurts too bad, then we will wait for it to pass and I will keep you company through those days so long and black."