hey unloving..

"For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will save it. What good is it for a man to gain the whole world, and yet lose or forfeit his very self?"

I have so much trouble with this upsidedown kingdom, this counter-culture, that the bible teaches. I try so hard to do good but i end up doing wrong, i try so hard to love but i end up hating, i try so hard to forgive but i end up holding grudges. But i read these Words, these words that contradict everything that i've been taught by society, and it's like i can see this truth emerging. The life i'm striving after isn't the life i was meant to live. You see that's the problem, i do it all on my own. I try to live and find my own answers and my own direction in my own life. But what if there was real life out there, one with real ansewers and real truths, and I just need to lose this selfish life first in order to find it. I've already been shown I can't do it on my own.

'hey unfaithfull i will teach you, to be stronger
hey un loving,
i will love you" -underoath.